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If your Heart Ain’t In It

I haven’t written in a few months. I suffered two “Widow Maker” heart attacks on June 14th, 2021. That’s a reality check at 51 years old. I now have a couple of new stents in there, and an enlightened outlook on life. Laying in the hospital waiting to die at any minute really brings some things into perspective that’s for sure. It doesn’t get any more Real than that. 

There are so many things that go through your mind when something like that happens. The Club Life is one of them when you are as imbedded as I am. I’ve been Runnin and Gunnin hard for many years. I didn’t realize the toll it was taking on me. It happens so gradual you don’t even notice until it feels like you got shot in the chest with a 12 gauge. It turns out when they told us when we were young that we’d pay for it someday, they weren’t lying. I’ve had to really step back and take a look at what I’m doing to myself with the long hours, the stress of Leadership, the miles and time invested. I know no moderation. It’s 100% or nothing. But now I get it. I’m actually human. I’m actually mortal. You know they say there are old bikers, and stupid bikers, but few old stupid bikers. 

Fortunately for me my Cardiologist said I have no permanent damage. If I take these 6 pills a day for maybe a year, quit acting like I’m 30, and focus on my health I can get through this ok. That doesn’t mean I can’t live the lifestyle I have chosen; it means learn moderation. Learn exception, not the rule. 

I just spent the weekend with members of my club that have 2 months to 50 years in our patch. I’m thankful I got the opportunity, and it wasn’t at my funeral. Imagine that. 50 years. Incredible. My plan is to stick to it. I don’t really know any other life. But I plan to do it smarter. I will never make 50 years in this patch. It’s almost statistically impossible. But I have much to give, much to teach, and much to learn, just as you may also. Take care of yourself! 

Give all you can, but if your heart ain’t in it, hang it up. My heart is not what it used to be, but it’s 100% Real.

My Road name is Tabasco, Keep it Real!

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